What is the secret of attraction?

Contrary to popular belief, the secret of attraction cannot be learned.  Still, the idea of this natural force is something humans seek to harness and control. Many people assume its something you can pursue or have and wield like  magical power to turns heads.  Yet, if not that, you may ask what is it that actually influences what and whom you attract?

You may be surprised to hear that the source of your assumed animal magnetism is not what you think.  Sexual prowess relates to confidence, and appreciation of the physical body, but there's more.  Beneath the surface, attraction is an energetic force.  You allow yourself to feel it through acceptance and being aware of something deeper.  Its about raising awareness of a soul connection.

In essence, the source of true power of attraction is to tap into existing mental clarity.  That's right! This is about seeing through what ego tells you attraction is and focusing all faculties and skills to manifest the purpose known deep in the soul.  You know when you are in the presence of someone who lives in the now.  You feel peace and contentment of the universe without doing anything. Be the divine force inherent in us all.

"The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action. They know that love is not a mere sentiment, but the ultimate truth at the heart of the universe." -Deepak Chopra 

Nourish yourself

 What does it mean to nourish yourself? How do you know if you are doing okay? 

On some level, whatever you do or do not do serves you in some way.  On another level, being conscious and making connections between thoughts, feelings and behaviour enriches your life.  Which life changes do you wish to bring about?

Notice that as you know how balance and harmony feel, you are in position to truly help others help themselves.  When something does not feel right in your life, this also invites closer attention.  As you focus on the joy arising in what you do, and even when you do nothing, you notice the right thoughts and right choices come naturally.  You are what you eat and what you think about too.

"People are like dirt. They can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die." -Plato

"Seeds of faith are always within us; sometimes it takes a crisis to nourish and encourage their growth." -Susan Taylor

Celebrate your true greatness

You may unintentionally hide your true greatness.  If you remain in environments, relationships and behavioural patterns that temper your enthusiasm, you do more than diminish your spirit.  You make it seem life is harder than it is.

If you find yourself over-thinking, feeling worried and anxious, and generally out of sorts, you may be in relationships you outgrow or, be doing things out of habit that imprision your soul. What can you do to be free? Discover 5 things you can you do now;

1) Recognize things only seem to get worse before they get better.

Some relationships break up or fade out of life before new ones grab your attention.  It could be romance, business arrangments, friendships or other connections that no longer resonate or feel right. Shifts are part of a natural cycle much like how day flows into night, sunrise leads to sunset. Attitude or how you feel about it all, can help you to accept what comes with grace and relief,  allow being in the flow, and know all is well.

2)  Know letting go of self-criticism is as easy as you decide.

Notice that nobody is as hard on you as you are on yourself.  You are your own judge and jury.   Anytime you tell a sob story of struggle or victimhood, you are allowing this to sap your energy and prevent you from being all you can be.  Imagine how much easier life is as you fill up with compassion and understanding. Chalk everything about discomfort up to experience. Let go of sources of irritation.  View it as a gift.  Move on.

3) Trust your life offers endless joy, inspiration and opportunities.

Even now, endless opportunties are available to you.  You simply decide how to see as well as what to overlook. Consider the Sun, Moon, stars,  celestial bodies and other objects are always in the same sky. Why choose to notice some things more in day or night? Conditioning. In fact, you are selectively aware about your abilities and potential. As you grow aware of your beliefs and esteem, you are free to shift focus.

4) Be true to yourself

As you make choices that are true to your heart, you bring joy and comfort into the lives of others.  You have no urge to cling to situations that evoke imbalance and anger. You welcome upheavals as signs of growth and do not permit the gripes and grudges of others to bother you. Feel what its like to bless and forgive as part of your journey.

"I celebrate myself, and sing myself." - Walt Whitman 

What do you run away from?

What do you run away from? Why is this?  What difference does this make if nobody is there?

Notice whether you allow others to impose their world of emotions on you.  You can choose to deflect or transcend such things. Simply stop taking things personally.

Notice if you always seem to be busy and/or get your kids' schedules jam-packed. Why are you really avoiding solitude and silence? Watch what happens as you reach that unspoken threshold.  Life as you know it,  falls apart.  Nature takes things into its own hands.  The universe reminds you that you cannot avoid facing yourself forever.

When you are finally alone, and the mind is quiet, you, the "ego" disappears.  As you view this as a symbolic release of what is not you, you start to notice thought and awareness of thought. The desire to control thoughts and events is replaced with trust and awareness of feeling.  Fighting, conflict, competition all cease. This is the end of a sense of togetherness, loneliness and comparing. In fact, no other remains. How do you respond to nothing?

Whether or not you spend time with others, you can choose to be friends with yourself. When you run away from something, like during nightmares, a goal you doubt, a relationship or opportunity you deny yourself, fear of not being, getting or doing exerts a hold over you. 

As you stop looking for answers outside yourself, the loving heart melts that which blocks you from merging with everything.  How you relate to peace determines whether you allow yourself to be disturbed. Grasp how it is to be free.  You are the problem and solution.

"People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates." -Thomas Szasz

"When you stop controlling things, you are not disturbing life, and life does not disturb you."
- Ajahn Brahm

Reconnect with inner joy--10 Tips

 In the event that you temporarily disconnect from energy and enthusiasm, you can always take steps to reconnect with sources of inner joy.  Consider these ten suggestions and share your own;

1) Allocate regular 'me time' to reflect on what is going well

2) Find the silver lining in your current conditions

3) Celebrate every step along your journey to a goal

4) Spend time with positive and inspirational mentors

5) Create mantras & affirmations that uplift your spirits

6) Focus on your strengths and demonstrate them

7) Anchor your views in present, direct experience not fear of future "what ifs"

8) Remind yourself that everything unreal (evokes discomfort and) is impermanent

9) Keep an open mind & reach for guidance if it feels right

10) Always expect the best. You get what you think about!

"Let there be more joy and laughter in your living."  -Eileen Caddy