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Entries in self-discipline (5)


Interview with Maria

I am often asked what brings particular clients to me. Some wish to journey into higher realms for guidance, get grounded, transform troubled relationships, identify and release limiting beliefs, or increase capacity to heal their bodies. Every individual is unique. I share this recent exchange with Maria for the benefit of you who are seeking answers to your own questions. 

What prompts you to open up to me?

Maria: To be honest, I was not looking for a coach with specific credentials. I am trusting my gut. In speaking with you,  I felt a real connection. It just felt right to take the next step. I explored your website.  What I read on the internet confirmed this is the right choice for me. 

Have you had particular expectations?

Maria: Well, before beginning, you asked if I had specific intentions, whether I have any experience with hypnosis, remembering my dreams, past life regression, various therapies and healing practices. I suppose my point of reference for our sessions began with the idea I could add to what I have experienced.  I want to learn to trust myself more, get to the root of obstacles I am facing, to shift patterns I see that are holding me back, get clearer on where to go from here. 

If I ask you what you feel you can do for me, what would you say?

I am not here to answer your questions, I am here to help you stop asking them. As a sound-board, I help you to notice when you think and feel the way through life.  I also help you to begin to recognize and take responsibility for each of your choices.

Maria: That says a lot.  I ask loads of questions.  Answers are not always clear to me.  I am told I am too emotional and wish to get a handle on that, take more time for me and get over my fears.

Whatever you fear invites you to get-to-know yourself differently. As you change the way you see things, what you see changes. Noticing anything about filters?

Maria: I am seeing obstacles differently.  I am more aware of lessons and options to respond to what life throws me. The way I react emotionally to people and events my life is not always helpful. I also notice emotions I am not really in touch with and resist feeling.  I still take some things personally and wish to change this. I do not like losing control.

Some perceptions are helpful and empowering, while others perpetuate negative patterns.  A shift in perspective starts with an increase in awareness. Do you relate?

Maria: Yes. As I grow aware of the my judgements and beliefs, I begin to grow aware of what and who triggers me. I really want to stop losing control over my emotions.

Indeed.  As we progress with sessions, are you noticing shifts in perception?

Maria: I am noticing that my reality changes based on how I feel about it, who I hang around and how I use my time. I am also more aware that making the unconscious conscious is one path to healing. My own ignorance, indifference and inaction only perpetuates discomfort and keeps dreams out of reach. 

You may have heard the idea, 'you are becoming like the five people you spend the most time with.' Personal reality is based on beliefs, expectations.  Experiences reinforce beliefs. So, if you want to change your reality, changing perception is key. 

Maria: In my case, re-training the mind for change takes practice. I work on self-discipline.

Letting go gets easier. Of all the practices we are exploring so far, what stands out?

Maria: The breathwork, different mental processes and ah-ha moments that I have after our open dialogue.

Why are you receptive to breathwork ?

Maria: What you offer are techniques that enable me to gain deeper insight into myself, my resistance.  It hits I allow myself to hinder or speed up self-healing. I am more aware of core beliefs that have been running me and the reasons why my life brings me to where I am.  It feels good to take steps to shift my focus and priorities. 

Why has your most recent session helped you?

Maria: You give me opportunity and space to explore things that I do not make time for by myself. I am more aware than ever before that I get wrapped up in the day-to-day tasks of being a wife, parent, student and doing my best to juggle it all.  Until today, I had no idea the deeper source of my patterns.  Making the unconscious conscious is already changing how I feel about myself and how confident I am about where I am headed.  You guide me to recall what I forget.

I'm sure you have a theme: the theme of your life. You can embellish it or desecrate it, but it's your theme, and as long as you follow it, you will experience harmony and peace of mind. - Agatha Christie


4 Questions from Stephen R. Covey

Everyone has access to the exact same wisdom within themselves. What differs is the pace and path taken to open our eyes, wake up, expand perception, shift to do and be what matters most.

It is said that everyone is lost until they grow aware and tap into that special something that naturally allows joy to flow within. Focusing here on this thing consistently, aligning thoughts, words and actions with this is the key to existence.  Yet, how can one really know what this is?

Take a moment to reflect on who inspires, guides you to grow more intimate with yourself.

Perhaps Stephen R. Covey is one inspirational mentor who jumps into mind. Renowned leadership authority, family expert, teacher, organizational consultant, and co-founder of FranklinCovey Co., he is author of several international bestsellers.  He was a master teacher because he was first a master student. 

Dialogue, interactions and relationships created his school of life without walls.  He admitted he never presented new concepts but succinctly put information together and synthesized it for people. His books include The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Powerful Lessons in Personal Change) & The 8th Habit (From Effectiveness to Greatness) and First Things First.

In a book called A Time Conscious Life,  a compilation of his insights, four questions stand out:

    *What questions can you ask yourself to keep learning (&/or unlearning or letting go)?
    *What knowledge can you gain by asking the right questions?
    *What life changes can you make by embracing the knowledge you discover?
    *What discipline is needed to make those changes part of your true character?

    Allow yourself to surrender, feel the way into the next chapter of your life.  When you stop fighting yourself,  and listen to the heart, you soon realize so much more than what you think exists and beckons you to branch out.  Go ahead-expand into more of your gifts and true genius.

5 Tips to catapult in new directions

Every moment, you can clarify or reshape what you have to offer the world. You can boost your self- confidence or encourage others, boost your public profile, boost or reshape the image you wish to present to the world.  This may involve shifts and transitions where it helps to have some extra insight or support. Amidst life change, you choose to be angry or arrogant, a seeker or avid explorer of choices, until everything feels like smooth sailing.  Not feeling like that yet? Consider 5 tips to catapult yourself in new directions;  
1. Idenitfy a focus

Pinpoint what makes you unique.  This involves self-reflection, soul searching about what makes you feel good and what it is you would like to share with or offer others.  This could be things like creative ways to use time , share expertise or mentoring, developing and marketing a product or service. Listen to the heart.
2. Nurture self-discipline

In order to feel like you make progress,  you must be willing to channel energy and attention into your own process.  This translates making a priority and recognizing what distracts you so you do not procrastinate.  Its helpful to be aware of when you mind is wandering away from the task at hand or when you shift away for other reasons. 


You can begin with a skeleton-like focus, but you also need to add detail to run with the idea.  Where would you like this life boost to take you? It is a specific geographic location?  A particular community or professional evironment, or would you like to transplant yourself where you are in more frequent contact with like -minded people?  Whatever it is, write it down.  Draw or create a vision board.  Shre your reflections with others if it feels right. Allow details to fall into place so that this process feels more real.
4. Connect

Draft a list of who you feel would benefit from what you have to offer and how you can connect with them.  Where can you go to interact with people of similar interests, who share your passion or who could benefit from your experience? Draft a one sentence explanation of what you do. Write letters or emails. Use technology for initial contact yet strive to arrange in-person dialogue and meetings to strengthen connections and make a difference in people's lives.
4. Speak

Whether its finding confidence to speak up at a social gathering or, to contact people about doing talks about your area of expertise, the important thing is to find your words and use them aloud to make a lasting impression. Make a video, teach a skillshare course.
5. Show integrity
When you say you are ging to be somehwere at a certain time, be punctual.  If you offer to speak to a group of people on a topic of mutual interest, coem through.   Your behaviour is always painting a picture.

7 Ways to revive & revitalize

When you sense you feel restless in a set of particular conditions, its important to ground yourself or at the very least, identify what would ground you.  This is a process to pinpoint 7 ways to revive and revitalize. These are sample areas coaching can assist you to

1. Body Awareness- Pay attention to your body and physical sensation

2. Nature Awareness- Spend time in Nature & learn to sense differently

3. Activity Awareness- Review your priorities

4. Mental Awareness- Discover how to truly listen to yourself

5. Soul Awareness- Pinpoint values and alignment or misalignment

6. Feeling Awareness- Tune into feelings & express in this moment

7.  Absolute Awareness- Take Steps to expand perception


Envision the ideal you

Every moment, every human being is actually living a dream.  You can be living and creating consciously or unconsciously.  Pay attention to how consistent you are with how you think and feel. Its common to allow thoughts, words and actions to go against the very ideal you envision. Look into a mirror and allow yourself to see your true essence. Flashes of abilities and potentials appear around the mirror and fade.  Where do they go?

Watch what happens as you focus attention on the ideal scenario, right where you stand.  Develop self-discipline and commitment to this vision. What does this entail? How is it already taking shape? How can you allow the vision to take deeper root in your experience? Does your ideal vision resonate with true essence or is it driven by something else?