The key to happiness
Wednesday, May 16, 2012 at 1:44PM Recognize that nothing comes into your life without your attention. Nothing stays in your life without your attention either. Pay attention to passing thoughts. Listen to your words. Observe your behaviour. Notice your experience unfolds based on you.
When you choose to feel joy, this is evidence of success. When you choose to talk about why you feel unhappy or why life is not going well, is it any wonder your experience reflects your words? You always get what you ask for. This also goes beyond words.
Take for example a woman who used to complain and self-criticize. She came to me and said one of her goals was to engage in a healthy, loving relationship. Unaware of the impact of her behaviours, she told me she slept in the middle of a big bed, filled her two sided closet with stuff, used one of her garages for storage and the other for a car. She also worked crazy hours with no social life. As she raised awareness, she began to see she was not being kind to herself or others and not making space for anyone to enter her life. Amazing things happen as you make space in the home and the heart. She cleaned out half her closet and started sleeping on one side of the bed. She chose to work less, was kinder to people because she could be not because she had to be. She began to see all life experience invites her to love herself more. As she did, in thought, word and deed, the perfect partner entered her life. She discovered the key to happiness is loving yourself.
Another example is a man who sees his family moving from a rental to owning a home. He takes great pleasure from the vision. He knows that nurturing joyful feelings is bringing a good feeling space closer in his reality. It has to feel like the next logical step. Grateful for the location and convenience of the rental, the whole family is also eager for what is coming. They appreciate the natural surroundings of their new suburb, visit houses, post an image of the house to buy like a vision board on the wall and look at it often. They explore furniture showrooms, discuss how to remodel parts of the new house and add solar panels. They develop a related business plan. Although a banker said they do not currently qualify for the mortgage they want, they remain optimistic. They thank the banker for his advice while sensing money comes from varied sources. They know the 'what' always comes before the 'how.' They behave as though details are in motion, give away belongings they no longer use, and do things you do as you prepare to move. They trust the universe has a plan. Life shows them the key to happiness is to be joyful where you are and focus beyond the limits of the mind.
Another example is a woman who asks me guidance in identifying her life purpose. I remind her that she has nothing to figure out and nobody to live up to. We are each eternal beings who create our paths and everything about our experience. Its easy to forget that well-intentioned people train you away from your own inner guidance system. I say to the woman as I say here you cannot make decisions that are the best for you while pleasing others. There is no finished portrait of your mission that you can ever reach. You move incrementally through experiences that are simply meant to make you feel good. So, you cannot get off your path. You can only live a purposeful life. You can be deliberate about creating or not. You are consciously in love with life and express this, receive and feel this fully or not. For this woman, the key to happiness is to recognize events unfold based on how she feels and what she chooses to experience.
Ultimately, the key to happiness is the feeling of worthiness in all you do, knowing your value, that whatever you do you are winning, getting ahead, living the dream, that whatever anyone else is thinking or doing is irrelevant. As you get a handle on how you feel, its like allowing yourself to be who you are. In this state, everything comes to you. Even to feel negative emotion is pointing to who you really are. Take this away:
1) Dwelling on 'what is', on what the mind judges is wrong or not possible prevents what could be from coming. Ignoring 'what is' is as simple as focusing on something else.
2) Love yourself as the larger part of you does. You only suffer if you cut yourself off from love and acceptance. You are the creator from the beginning to the end. Know what you do and do not want. Know what feels not good and what feels better.
3) Revel in contrast. Come into alignment with the best feeling thought you can find. Rather than saying, "It could be worse if...", say instead, "It is so great that..." or "It is fantastic that..." or "Its truly a blessing that..." or "It is so fortunate that..."
4) Be eager and solutions-oriented when apparent obstacles arise. Remind yourself that more than one way to do things and to get places exists. Be resourceful.
5) Be someone who chronically appreciates everything. reach out and help others because it is the right thing to do. Be generous with no expectations. Know you are living a good life. Achieve the vibration consistently and watch what happens.
6) Feel fulfilled as you are, wherever you are, and then like magic, "it" comes.