Go back to where you've always been

Keep doing what's right even when what's wrong continues to happen to you.  You can be a victor and not a victim. What does this mean? You aren't helpless. You're in charge of yourself.  There is nobody and no situation that can prevent you from moving forward if you make that choice.  Examine what you think you know and believe. Revise it. 

1) What hurts you so much inside that it drives you to feel you must hurt others to heal it?  All attack and criticism can be seen as a kind of defense to hide things.  What might you fear?  The illusion of superiority may make you feel bigger and better.  Yet, as time passes, you simply act worse, care less and less and look smaller and less significant to others.

2) Trust that if a person isn't friendly to you, then others will help fulfill your destiny. The 'right people' will come into your life so long as you detach from people who are discouraging or superficial.  Meaningful links will emerge. If you feel good about some people, listen to your soul. 

3) When you give up self-defeating beliefs or disadvantageous situations, life will improve. If you wish to alter your methods of perception and understanding, step away from your fallacies.

Just as you already have the dreams and goals in your heart, all you have to do is develop faith that you will help make these happen.  Our destiny is connected to other people we meet, or have known. Reach out to them.  What do they tell you about social constructions and mores?  What do they tell you about the accuracy of your observations and conclusions? Tell it like it is. Go back to where you've always been, retrieve that mindset to get on with it!

Witness what you hope to see

Ever been in a bind and not known what to do? Ever call out for assistance  aloud to things beyond you for an answer?

Recently, after an appointment, I entered my friend's borrowed car only to discover the steering wheel was stuck and this little red hand symbol flashed on the dash-board with a black image of a car inside it. Try as I did,I was unable to jostle and loosen the steering wheel side-to-side. I verified that the car was indeed locked "in park" and observed the parking break was in place. I locked and unlocked the car, got out, locked and unlocked the car again, circled the vehicle on foot, checked interior buttons and levers yet, saw nothing unusual I thought would cause trouble.

As it happened, I didn't find the instruction manuel or anything to explain my dilemma. Try as I did, the keys wouldn't fit in the keyhole to start the engine. Using my mobile, I phoned a good friend whom I thought would understand the issue. No luck. Rather than call roadside assistance for things I assumed would be minor, I chose instead to look around. Initially, I didn't see anyone I could ask my car question. I continued to rattle my brain for answers and tried a few new things.

Then, suddenly, a middle-aged Asian couple walked up over the hill toward me. They strolled at a normal pace. I approached them and mentioned my apparent dilemma. I described what I had tried and inquired if the man had had any similar experiences. He replied thoughtfully, "yes" and asked, "do you trust me?" Looking into his sparkling eyes, I replied, "why, certainly." I instinctively handed him my keys. His wife smiled and stood quietly beside me. I watched the man sit in the car,jiggle the steering wheel differently than I had and perform a few maneuvers which enabled him to start my engine. I was pleased. "Thanks so much!" I exclaimed, relieved.

As the couple walked down the road, I sat in the car and turned to find my sunglasses. Although the road was straight and the sidewalk was visible, the older couple who had helped me seemed to vanish. When I looked up, they were nowhere to be seen. Both people evoked a very peaceful feeling inside me. As I pulled out of my parking space and onto the road, I realized that helpful people are all around us but we rarely slow down or look in ways to enable us to see them.

One theory says that angels are spiritual beings who never lived as mortals on Earth. Other ideas, however, believe that loved ones who have passed on can become our guardian angels. Remind yourself that if you learn to stop fretting about situations which aren't going your way, you will experience the presence and assistance of angels. You're only a step away from understanding this larger reality. Move beyond the five senses you typically use to grasp the world around you. Who is it that decides what's possible? You do. You decide what to do and believe.  Witness what you hope for.  It's not what you think you know, but what you do that matters.

Ideal appeal --what's the big deal?

Plenty of articles discuss ideal weight, ideal homes, the ideal job, ideal sales prospects, ideal role models, ideal situations, ideal schools, ideal lifestyles, and even ideal children.  Virtually any category or experience you could devise could also be associated with an ideal.  If your vision of what you assume is better than what you know or have, then such goals could be destructive to your self-image and perception of the world outside yourself.

For many people, attaining perfection is a dream that highly motivates or strongly discourages them to extremes.  Are you working toward the impossible? To what degree our visions of "ideal" are misguided or even dangerous remains personal and subjective. Did you ever know anyone who was prone to justify anything? You may have done this especially if it enabled you to feel closer to that imaginary carrot goal, hanging from the fishing line just out of reach.  

1) ideal as a standard of excellence: if you set a goal to win a race and choose an athletic mentor who has followed rigorous training to achieve similar goals, then you may get ahead. It's up to you.

2) ideal as conforming to an acceptable standard: if you decide to suppress or hide your true self so as to live up to someone else's ideal, then you'd benefit from evolving to question your motives.

3) ideal as a figment of your imagination: if you frequently feel unhappy with yourself, your choices or the results of efforts, remind yourself that you create your realistic or unrealistic goals. 

4) ideal as embodying perfection in body: if you're preoccupied with what other people look like, compare yourself and focus on scales of beauty, you may terrorize yourself by your beliefs.

5) ideal as a highly-desirable state of mind: if you are not as 'goal-oriented' as you would like to be, realize that belief creates behaviors.  Aren't behaviors what you could change to clarify goals?

6) ideal as a constructed situation: if you perceive reality as simply black and white, then you may cling to your past and deny yourself opportunities to expand on your thoughts and activities.

It's time to realize goal-setting benefits from examining what you've learned in your life.  You may have conditioned yourself to believe only limited ways exist to lead you to the 'right path.'  Be willing to step back from what you've already been taught, from all those visions of things or experiences you're convinced you desire.  All these goals are self-created.  Move past what you think you work toward. Determine which among the goals is truly what you seek and expand on it. 

Measure your satisfaction

You may awaken at some point and in your life with thoughts of what it would take to feel more satisfied. You think you've found what it takes to motivate you. You find energy to work toward it. This may mean taking a course, studying for a test, exerting an effort that motivates you further.

You have discovered new reason to get up in the morning. You nurture hope. You feel you get closer to achieving your this ultimate experience, and then, something happens and you aren't able to achieve it. How you react will determine whether you perceive yourself differently. How you see yourself will determine whether you seek to change your view or circumstances.

1. Do you choose to focus on other desires, expectations, needs, or demands?

2. Do you decide to forget your original desire, want, or conditioned need?

3. Do to reassure yourself and convince yourself to keep trying?

4. Do you question endlessly whether you gave up too soon?

5. Do you find ways to dispel your self-doubt?

6. Do you disavow fully any debt, past sense of obligation, or not let go?

7. Do to sense a desire to apologize for a perceived failure?

8. Do you recognize an opportunity to redefine success?

It may be difficult to decide when to give up on a particular plan for success or when to revise it and keep moving toward new things you believe in. Some people spend their entire lives believing in the possibility of realizing a certain kind of satisfaction, and never give up. No matter what the odds or obstacles, they have faith. Other people may develop a sense of impatience and give up or decide its wiser to change focus for better results.

Whatever your situation, a sense of success can be grounded in your perception of satisfaction. How would you define this feeling? If you don't yet think you know what this is, how do you think it would feel? What would you imagine would contribute to your sense of satisfaction? Perhaps you don't link satisfaction with success at all. Some people are completely non-emotional about success. How do you measure levels of satisfaction? Take steps to clarify it in relation to success:

a) Is it emotional?

b) Is it spiritual?

c) Is it qualifiable

d) Is it quantifiable?

e) Is it better understood another way?

Close but no cigar

For anyone who has ever written a story and sought to publish it, in all likelihood, that person has also learned what its like to be rejected or kindly turned away.  If you've authored a book and sent out query letters to publishers, you may also know what its like to wait months Perhaps the writer was told that "the time isn't right" or "the material isn't suitable" or "market trends are changing."  Perhaps you didn't receive any details about the rejection. Whatever the reason, this kind of experience is humbling.  Yet, if you permit it, you can choose to learn a great deal.

1.  Don't take rejection personally: learn to step back and see yourself separate from your writing. What other people like or dislike about your writing isn't necessarily personal criticism.

2. Recognize a blessing in disguise: take this opportunity to reflect on your work, rethink or re-edit pieces and re-submit it to publishers. Remind yourself you're better off with a new chance. 

3. Request feedback: in many cases, you can obtain valuable comments from publishers, editors or friends and other people whom you permit to read your material.  Be brave. Ask! 

4. Consult an agent: if you have no agent, it would be in your interest to find someone who respects your work and encourages your writing development. Seek one out. Submit material.

5. Incorporate your spirit: rejection may postpone the unveiling of your true masterpiece.  While you review your work, decide whether you write with your heart or even from the soul.