Did I really do that?

Everybody can reflect on experiences and view the past differently in the present. You have insight into yourself now that you did not have before. And yet, certain choices or behaviours may still amaze you. When have you asked, "did I really do that?" What meaningful lessons did you gain?

One man I know broke baby toes on each foot more than once. He did so as the result of making his way to the toilet in the dark. He was reluctant to admit his night vision was not dependable. Yet, when the doctor taped his toe for the third time, it was no dream. The man then opted to use a flashlight.

I recall a time in my life when I lived in the Netherlands for a summer. Before I ended up juggling seven jobs (one for each day of the week), I had a few curious job interviews based on misunderstanding newspaper ads. One waitressing job turned out to be in a bar that offered legal drugs on their exotic menu. The masseuse interview turned out to offer additional erotic massage training in the basement of a bar with leopard couches and sheepskin rugs.  Although I chose not to accept these two positions, I learned that each experience is a teacher. I learned to find humor, keep composure and a straight face.

A good friend of mine was accepted to a university Master's program. His parents helped him pack up and move to a nearby city. He had lived at home during his undergrad, so this was his first home away from home. Yet, he was not away a week before he decided to abandon the program and called his parents to pick him up.  He listened to his gut. This inner growth served him. Not only did he learn to listen to his heart and pursue a more fulfilling career. He also gained the confidence to come out of the closet and be truer to himself. As he learned to face his fears, he inspired greater self-acceptance in the lives of family, friends and patients. Looking back, he wonders what took him so long to be more honest.

What we used to perceive as thoughts to be disregarded, do not have to be dismissed.  Some insights we gain are visceral.  They change as profoundly as our subjective experiences.

Comments

[Lance]

Hi Liara,
I have done that! (although I'm drawing a blank as far as an example).

Thank you for sharing your experience, Liara. I actually enjoy hearing these very much - I like seeing this side of you - how you've become who you are today. So, I am deeply thankful for this.

The idea of being honest with ourselves - I really think I'm just getting to this point in my life - honest at a very deep level - and it is very liberating...

Oh, and I like the new look - very nice, my friend!

[Liara Covert]

Lance, every choice we make contributes to who we are. And yet, every person is quick to disregard certain personal experiences as if some are more important than others. In truth, we create our own hierarchies or preferred memories based on things we do not grasp about ourselves. As you raise awareness, you sense value in everything and realize instances of confusion and discomfort are precursors to revelations and huge growth spurts.

[davina]

Hi Liara. I enjoyed reading about your Netherland adventures :-)

Honesty is tricky -- I can be honest and say that I'm not always honest with myself. And that may be fear clouding things. Sometimes I know when this is happening and can correct it.

The times when it's unconscious are the most pleasant learnings, because when it makes the switch into consciousness a light turns on -- an ah ha moment is born.

[Liara Covert]

Davina, as you choose to act, your life is constantly changing. You are altering the energy vibrations you send out. You also alter the experiences and people that you invite into your life. It is vital to act on your impulses. I can think back to all kinds of things I have done that cause me to think I may have been crazy. Yet, I allowed myself to get emotionally involved with my ideas. I was prepared to do anything honest to earn money. My Netherlands initiatives resulted in landing seven jobs in seven different places. It was an exercise in developing my resourcefulness. I was realizing that following my hunches was teaching me more than if I had only chosen to imagine what going for job interviews would be like. I was tuning into my energy, nurturing faith in my potential and taking action to make dreams happen. That summer, I earned the money I needed to realize I goal I had set. Then, I moved onto another goal and another and another.