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« 10 things that are helping my friend recover from cancer | Main | Let yourself go and see what happens »
Monday
Dec292008

6 Ways to work through unconscious anger

When people express emotions, they are not necessarily behaving as you would expect.  That's right.  Someone could be expressing one emotion in an obvious way when that person is really concealing anger.  People behave in ways of which they are unaware.

As an information processing machine, you choose your conscious focus. You may not wish to deliberately express hurtful words.  You may have the spirit to fight back, but the will to control it.  Although apparently effective, mental tactics may deny rather than enable you to work through underlying issues. There is always more than what you see.

Many people have grown up with lots of anger and a lifetime of emotional bagage that requires much energy to sustain. Even when you distract yourself from this, you are not dissolving it as you may think. Consider 6 ways to work through your own hidden anger;

1) Recognize moments are open-ended.  You have no reason to rush, to get upset about being late or, for focusing on what you are not doing with your perceived time. Time is an invention you create. Ask how believing in time leads you to create anger.

2) Evolve to feel enormous and expanding.  Frustration often occurs when human beings convince themselves that they are limited, restricted and confined to mindsets and certain physical conditions.  As you learn to understand you are not confined to anything unless it is by your own choice, then you can also make different choices.

3) Translate thoughts into images rather than words.  Learning to shift the energy you take on-board requires that you evolve on some level to understand it.  You are always doing things that are preparing you for things you have not foreseen.

4) Stop perceiving what was. Choose instead to perceive what is.  People regularly live grounded in the past. They orient their choices around how they felt or what they did before. It is a process to move beyond this to focus on how you feel now. How you think and behave is often based on who you were. Believe in the malleability of the mind.

5) Move toward fearlessness.  Some people assume this is easier said than done.  You are what you think.  When you imagine fear, you may overlook that you create reason after reason to justify this illusion.  Anger is the result of being dishonest with yourself.

6) Believe you will transcend what bothers you.  Nurturing self-confidence is key to sensing you accomplish things.  As you encourage yourself, you boost your esteem and  accept your intrinsic value.  When people do not consciously believe in themselves, they create imbalance with the part of their psyche that knows how truly capable they are.  Imbalance in energy level can result in anger. Exercises that develop mental discipline and working with encouraging people empower you to overcome anything you choose.

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Reader Comments (2)

This is extremely helpful, thank you.
January 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commentershadow
shadow, anger emerges for all kinds of reasons. As you recognize how you feel, you may be completely unaware that underlying anxiety fuels your defensive sense of anxiety or other misguided reactions. Each person can create a calmer emotional climate inside as the result of choosing to explore what is going on. Learn to listen to your inner voice. You intuit what you need. By the way, Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. wrote, The Dance of Anger and The Dance of Fear which you may decide to consult or read.
January 8, 2009 | Registered CommenterLiara Covert

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