Embracing adversity

Every person encounters adversity or, you might say that it even seeks you out. Do you ever feel as though you invite in the gremlins, the trouble or even disastrous circumstances? How might your understanding of yourself be enlarged and enhanced as the result of dealing with these things?

Imagine each challenging experience is another means to clarify or expand on your identity.  Do you feel as though you have had enough "tests?" Thinking you know something and experiencing it differ. Each learning phase further clarifies your understanding of success as well. People may criticize you, fire you from a job, abandon you in a relationship and their ideas of hardship may differ from your own.  You may retain or reject, combine and review reasons for adversity.  You learn your limits, more about strengths and weaknesses,  You even sense new kind of evolution.  At first, this may seem hard to grasp, yet, perceived difficulties are not always what they seem.

For some people, struggling to pay bills or find adequate food represents a level of adversity.  For others, being discouraged about goal-setting, not achieving goals fast enough, not getting chosen for a promotion, not feeling driven or losing a loved one, lead to undesireable suffering.  A closer look reveals varied circumstances enable you to learn to recognize and distinguish among choices.  You may experience and evaluate emotions.  You are given opportunities to compare options, to develop open or closed-mindedness, to explore sources of meaning in life.

I spoke with an older woman who described an example of adversity as very tough period in her personal life.  She confided that the process of separating from and divorcing her partner taught her that each relationship is like a horizon.  This woman sees herself differently now than she did then.  She chose to read books. She realized her past relationship choices were ways to send herself messages about what was meaningful and destructive in her life. 

At a given time, we each interpret experiences based on what we know about ourselves. Over time, the woman figured out what steps she had to take to change her circumstances for the better. She came to see success at every phase of her life based on how she chose to learn and grow. Now she has new inner strength which enables her to make healthier relationship choices.

Kaile Warren's life is quite a success story. Adversity came and shattered his life in the form of a debilitating car accident cost that him his thriving construction business, then his home, his financial security and his marriage.   As a homeless, discouraged man driven to sleep alone in an abandoned warehouse, he remembered his last 500$ in his pocket.  One night, he had a revelation about a new business idea. He went out the very next day and bought an old second hand white van. He painted "rent-a-husband" on the side. He paid money to get flyers made and put those on the windshields of women's cars he knew in his divorced support church group. 

One thing led to another. Before long, he had more work than he could handle.  He was even invited to do a local television interview which led to unexpected widespread marketing when the tv station shared the story with a national station.  Embracing adversity and choosing to move forward enabled him to start as a one-man operation designed to tackle all household projects, from air-conditioning installation to yard raking. This business grew to have franchises in multiple U.S. states and also in foreign countries.  Adversity can be a stepping stone to success.