Why we always do what we've always done
Sunday, February 18, 2007 at 10:39AM I know a man who absolutely refuses to wear slippers. Now, he will be quick to complain about cold floors, especially in winter, but this will not cause him to change his ways. He would rather suffer than accept and adopt a new way of doing things. I find this quite humorous myself.
I laugh at myself in disbelief after I forget to put on sunscreen and come home with a slight burn. At times, I'm simply forgetful, at times I feel cream is unnecessary. Yet, when will I ever learn?
I met a woman who always talked of the boyfriend she really wanted but never had. She chose to stay home at night after work and didn't go out to give herself a chance to meet anyone. She never thought changing her homebody habits might be the key to finding the man of her dreams.
The x-husband of a friend always had to be right. It didn't matter whether his ideas made no sense and hisx-wife had good suggestions of proven facts, this man always put her down and refused to admit mistakes or unfounded judgments.
The grandparents of another friend of mine had different ideas about what to do on Sundays. The grandmother attended church religiously and her husband felt sunday fishing was his religion. He would do just about anything for his wife six days a week but Sundays were reserved for him. They apparently had many debates over their 60 years together, but neither was ever willing to change their Sunday ways.
I know a girl who would often complain about what she wasn't doing to anyone who would listen. She'd whine about how she could never afford to do certain things, yet she refused to make any effort to earn some money. She preferred to gripe as she lived off the dole. She knew no other way and wasn't willing to be taught.
I have known a few bosses who believed in the tall poppy syndrome. They weren't happy when an enthusiastic new employee made extra effort to raise the standards and satisfy clients. These bosses did what they could to rid themselves of the employees and make their lives miserable. The bosses' insecurities caused them to bully people when they really didn't feel good inside. Since they refused to admit they felt underappreciated, their low self-esteem bottomed out.
Why is it your partner is always late? The person may plan ahead and you may still anticipate he or she will be late for their funeral. Do you think the person wonders why you're so punctual?
In some ways, we're all creatures of habit. Consider where and when you refuse to compromise or make changes in your life. Are you really better off being so stubborn? In many cases, you'd be better off learning to be more flexible. You might be surprised at the power you have to live a more rewarding life. If you always do what you've always done, you'll always have what you've already got, and you'll always be wherre you've been before without incentive to do any more.
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