Dream:
I was visiting an acquaintance at her home. I had always had a not so great relationship with her. She is married to my husband’s business partner so we were often forced to socialize and I knew she detested me but however hard I tried to win her over nothing changed. She had made up her mind. She and her husband immigrated to the USA a couple of years ago and they were back in South Africa visiting friends and she invited me over.
So I was at her old house which was empty now and we were chatting, she was obviously trying to be friendly and I appreciated the gesture. It was just the two of us. She took out this little box that had about ten tiny compartments. In each compartment was a tiny frog. Each frog had the most vivid and beautiful colours with patterns. Exquisite. I played with one or two frogs and then gave them back to her and she put them back in their respective boxes. I was curious and picked up the box because I wanted to see the other frogs and somehow the tops of the compartments came open and all the beautiful little frogs spilled out onto my lap and I couldn’t catch them quickly enough to put them back. The frogs hopped off into the next room. She didn’t seem too perturbed when I pointed it out. After a while I got up to go and look for the frogs and upon entering the other room saw two puppies who had eaten all the frogs in a playful game. There were chunks of dead frog parts and a blood puddle. I immediately ran to her and explained what happened. She was understandably furious and started screaming at me to get out and she regretted ever inviting me and she hates me etc…
I was extremely upset about the beautiful little frogs and how I had proved to be careless. I felt responsible and wretched and cried. I was so disappointed in myself. My friends arrived and tried to console me but I was distraught. I felt so awful. My one friend had a box with similar frogs (not as beautiful) and I asked him whether I could buy them from him to give to her as replacements but he didn’t want to sell them. They were rare and one could only purchase them in Pakistan. I felt a failure. I knew the dead frogs were an accident but I still felt completely responsible for ruining her attempt at trying to be nice. In the past years (before this incident) whenever she invited me over to her home to try and be nice - something awful always happened to cause us to remain estranged for a couple of years. It was as if destiny insisted that we shouldn’t be friends.
Insight:
Dream encounters are a projection of some part of ourselves. If someone despises or hates us, and we are triggered, then this is drawing our attention to something unconscious within our own psyche. We all have a shadow self. Its often made up of the parts of self we view as unacceptable. For many, this means things like our sadness, intense emotions like rage or hostility, even laziness, cruelty, grief or despair. Yet, you might also view this as relating to uncivilised behaviour or disowned parts of yourself like personal power, lost independence, emotional security or sensitivity.
Turns out, unacceptable treatment in dreams is a metaphor often couched in blame that evokes guilt and/or shame. Whatever beckons your attention on a deeper level, you assume self-blame, feel careless, responsible and self-punishment continues through dream worlds to get your attention.
Uneasy emotions are inviting you to explore more deeply what is going on inside. Shadow figures may evoke fear of rejection. If we do not learn to love, accept whatever we hide from, we project the unresolved feelings onto others (who trigger us to keep discomfort alive). The context of relationships reminds us of whether something is truly resolved. If someone leaves of moves away, it may be that part of yourself they represent is no longer needed is is healed. If they return, this is opportunity to restore or rekindle relationships, or a way the universe is telling you something deeper remains unresolved. If you truly desire to repair a friendship, then you must find a way to befriend yourself. That is, explore ways to decode and love your shadows.
This dream is also an invitation to accept and integrate the male side (assertive self, set and defend boundaries). There is something deeper going on here than an ongoing quest for connection, acceptance and belonging. This explains why the frogs escape. Somethng wants to show itself and you may not want to see it.
Dream figures like the frog appear to offer guidance and direction. Frogs are about evolution and coming into wholeness, Change is on the horizon. As your inner feelings are made known to yourself and those around you, it does not have to turn out to be a bloody mess. Dogs are known as man's best friend. The one in the dream is doing the dreamer a favor. The puppy heightens the sense of urgency to look. Something wants attention. Reflect on significance of the number 10.
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