During the early stages, it was about struggles for survival, safety, and stability. Like a film reel, I am repeatedly running from danger or authority, escaping control, the wrath of accusations of heresy, inconceivable abuse, torture, decapitation, immolation and even the unspeakable. I see from within and beyond body, feel caught in a cyclical trap. Many of those deaths came quickly, were painful or painless. Yet, the complete disconnect from feeling, lack of love, acceptance, connection and belonging evoked more suffering than anything physical. That revelation catapulted me forward, upward.

Next, I moved through experiences that highlighted emotional isolation and repressed sexual energies. In this film reel, I know mistreatment from individuals who are brutal yet, unaware, have a warped sense of self and struggle to function within their own version of reality. Through this mirror, I shifted from physical, biochemical and feeling disconnect to reconnect with natural healing. I allowed the body to do what its meant to do. This opened valves, unleashing limitless creativity and discovering doorways to true intimacy. Again, as winds shifted, a new tune began to play.

Then, journeys arose to reveal events in other spheres that led to low self esteem, lack of will power, hesitation to take personal responsibility. The film reel offered flashbacks about where I was manipulated, exploited, subjugated, dominated by misused power. Only as it dawned that nobody can intimidate me without my own consent did I experience huge shifts in energy, focus, direction, life conditions. It dawned I create my own magic, remove myself from environments I outgrow, come to feel limiting or unhealthy. Sometimes situations repeat in different settings, then hifts also happen simply because I have learned what is there to learn on a deeper level. This happens as I grow to resonate with something deeper, that which I know as my Soul.

Later on, moving through the heart, death seemed more about observing taboos, what we are culturally taught to fear, avoid and resist. The biggest lesson here for me is death is not about losing anything. Rather, its about strengthening a sense of what is always within us. At this stage, death happens as we are ready to recognize and let go of imbalances in our perception, grudges conditioned predjudices and related lies we tell ourselves. Conscious shifts in focus and consciousness are fuelled by the desire to feel more deeply and rediscover another facet of what it is to be truly alive.

Every life contains millions of decisions. Some are big and others seem smaller or less significant. Yet, every decision we make over another affects the outcomes and the direction of our path. At certain points, irreversible variations occur. Regardless of timeline or focus, our choices reveal who or what we truly are, far more than our ideas of limited abilities. Many versions of ourselves exist inside us. Every moment, every one of our thoughts and feelings have an influence on our course of direction. And this course changes. Reclaiming true power and sovereignty shifts gears again. From here, you consciously move in many directions and have a much wider sense of the unfolding.