Many of the uplifting stories we hear seem to require we get unhappy to find real happiness.  You may know people who swallow pills to change their mood, hire a coach to influence motivation, seek a clutter consultant to downsize belongings, change diet to boost energy and self-esteem, digest the advice of others without really knowing themselves. Every valiant effort and strategy has a time and place.  Yet, how well we know ourselves, and whether we have internalized a sense of entitlement, influences what we choose to learn about the nature of happiness.

Consider that in the 2006 film, The Pursuit of Happyness, actor Will Smith plays the role of Chris Gardener.  He's a smart but struggling salesman, husband and father.  His marriage sadly crumbles due to heavy financial difficulties. Determined to create a better life for himself and his son, he tells his son, "don't ever believe someone who tells you you can't do something."  Gardner is dscouraged when evicted from his home.  He finds shelters and bus stations with his son while he strives to excel in a stock broker's internship.  He's determined to transform his life and he does.

Through life experience, Garder's character demonstrates seeking pleasure in life doesn't mean we do just as we please.  He realizes certain actions will increase his sense of accomplishment and happiness yet, other actions (or lack of initiative) will diminish happiness.  He also shows we can't be certain whether happiness will result from simply learning as we go.  Hoping for the best may seem dangerous or inefficient, but we learn no single right decision exists.