Notice what I want is what you want and I cannot specify what you want.
When you do not know what you want, you may not have thought about it, or so many choices arise, you cannot choose. A naive view is a desire to control everything, some kind of technological omnipotence or power where the"I" (ego) is in charge. Craving is the source of suffering and exists due to ignorance. All disappointments are the result of frustrated desire and believing in the illusion and constraints of time.
When you reach the state of not wanting, not seeking, this is desirelessness. You have to let go and let it happen. Its not about arriving anywhere, not about a journey or being results-oriented at all. To be in complete control is not something any sensible person wants. Every moment, the universe is simply reacting to your perceived problems until you see they are imaginary. See if you can calm desire and be a master of life. When you get control of everything , what would you do with it? Turn off pain, foretell the future, read your thoughts, be above ordinary human frailty. Go beyond all pleasures at your command.
Why don't you know what you want?
a) You have it
b) You do not know yourself because you never can. The Godhead is not an object of its own knowledge.
I do not know is the same as humility, and unconditional love. If you know you do not understand. When you cease to cling to yourself, you access infinite power. It is common to waste energy trying to force things. The moment you stop, that wasted energy is available. When you stop defending yourself, you are letting go of energy you suppress, allowing it to flow.
What is helping you ?
1) Courage to see beyond fear
2) The fact that everything is in decay, dissolving, process of constant death is helping you because you do not have to let go. Nothing exists to hold.
3) The power that comes to you does when you do not reach out for it. It arises when you can be trusted fully with power (and do no harm)