What if you feel torn?

Very often, people feel as though their choices project results which would leave them in an awkward position either way. When was the last time you felt torn among choices? What kind of experience do you have in this regard? Reflect on this amidst any quandry;

1) Consider the hidden reasons you are drawn to each choice.

2) Notice when your impulse is to appease others at expense of self.

3) Remember you are not meant to please everyone (& seeking to do so reflects state of mind).

4) Ask what is real about the question. Transitory emotional states are not real.

5) Ponder the significance of a silent mind. Events follow events. See things as they are.

Comments

[Rizal Affif]

Nice advice, Liara... especially 3rd and 4th :)

Anyway I myself was trapped between two choices that it stressed me out for quite some times. But then I realized it could be another major issue I had to transcend in life so, instead of rushing, seeking immediate solution, I waited... and see where it leads. I was amazed to see how more and more clues appeared, and it is much easier to choose between them now.

Maybe, remembering that life is simply a lesson we need to learn, could really be very helpful :)

[Liara Covert]

Rizal, you highlight how valuable it is to sit back and attune to what the body and mind are saying. Realisation is the opposite of ignorance. Different parts of you sense what is best for you and they express this in different ways. Remember how to read the signals. One perspective is love has infinite forms of expression, yet people choose to interpret polarities, that is, a range of positive and negative experiences that ultimately bring you back to the same message: unconditional love and acceptance are all that is.

[Jannie Funster]

I think a silent mind is good because we raise awareness of the moment, realizing most things are not as important as we often may make them out to be.

Sometimes I struggle with wanting to help others, or even take action to make something happen, vis-a-vis sitting back and just realizing I have the choice to act, react or not. It seems a bit of a fine line at times.

xo

[Liara Covert]

Jannie, many people relate to the experience you share. It is not always realized that one's view of "helping" is actually an unconscious effort to control others, and impose your view of what is "good or better" for them. Your intentions may be good, but this is your interpretation of what is good. In truth, as one's focus on polarity (i.e., good-bad, right-wrong, better-worse) dissolves, it grows clearer that the only difference is created and dissolved in the mind. To be aware of one's natural state has nothing to do with what you are taught, with any labels you acquire on your journey back to wholeness. We are only ever torn when temporarily distracted from acceptance. One perspective is that "to feel torn" is an indication you resist loving your true self fully. It is not outside self.

[Robin Easton]

Hi dear Liara, I've missed being here and just LOVED your comment on Gail's post on my blog. Beautiful!!! I've hardly had time for much blogging or commenting as I've been knee deep getting my book ready for release. It's been quite a journey.

This topic you raise here is quite fascinating and one I just wrote about and will post next week....or an aspect of it. At one point in my life I realized that for me, more important than the "outcome" or "being torn" or "stuck" was that I actively LIVE life. That there really was no right or wrong and that everything already is in perfection. It is only a matter of me aligning myself with that perfection at any given moment, no matter what is happening. That and having a willingness to learn from "supposed" mistakes, a willingness to learn from trial and "supposed" error.

I also found that for ME it was more important to keep my life energy flowing, moving, fluid, in grace, than to stay torn or stuck worrying about which choice was "right". Because in essence it’s all right (alright) and Life will move on with or without me. And I decided that I preferred to be in the flow of it and that it was ALL LIFE, ALL RIGHT, ALL SAFE and ALL PERFECT. So it didn't really matter what I did, only that listen to my heart and soul as best I could and let Life happen. Well, actually Life is ALWAYS happening, but for me to throw myself into the glorious stream of Life and trust and know and BE one with it. To live thusly we look back on our life and we have no regrets, only an existence that is bursting with experiences, emotions, insights, knowing and delicious vitality.

Aaah, see? You always inspire me. LOL!! :)
I am hugging you dear friend.
Sending love your way.
Robin

[Liara Covert]

Robin, we are always grateful for your reflections. Writing is indeed a journey. Transform Your Life: 730 Inspirations is due to be released later this month and compiling that continues to be part of an embodiment process, part of expansion and healing for everyone involved in the project. As you suggest, we are always inspiring each other, consciously and unconsciously. Everyone does this for we are all one. It is a process of raising awareness and working to grasp any view of difference/ separation is illusion.

[Hilary]

Hi Liara ... at challenging times I often just change my thought or decision patterns and make that adjustment and I’ve learnt it doesn’t matter what’s gone has gone, what I can do is what is now & if that helps others then that is good.

I probably have been doing far too much for others and I now need to focus on me, after considering my mother. I am learning to be silent and to let things evolve .. I try and have two, three or more alternatives so the game plan is always there and I am going forward – but I need to press that button to fast start now.
All the best - Hilary

[Liara Covert]

Hilary, I recommend a book called Courageous Dreaming by Alberto Villoldo. You are not the only individual who acts as a rescuer or enabler on some level. Notice that to be aware of your behaviour is a step to empowering you to make new choices.