Dr. Liara Covert

Breathwork Psychotherapist
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Sunshine Coast, Queensland 



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« 3 Tips to learn to self-control | Main | 5 Tips to help you weather your current storm »

What if you are not waiting for anything?

During the holiday season, millions of people convince themselves they await that special gift, look forward to preparing or hosting the memorable family meal, anticipate that annual visit from a loved one,  and expect that tingly, effervescent feeling that bubbles up throughout the body.  What if it turned out that you do not really await anything?

Well, for starters, if you decided you have no deadline, then you would probably learn to relax more.  Your energy focus would change. The shopping frenzy often has people scurrying around all stressed out because of issues like cost, availability of the right item and delivery time.  It may turn out you really do not need what you thought you wanted.

Another thing: if you harbour no expectations, then you eliminate the prospect of disappointment. Who really wants to experience that? Consider the mindset of a monk who believes he has no reason for getting anywhere at a set time.  He nurtures flexibility and learns to readily adapt to change. To develop transferable skills always does you well.

When it comes to travel, certain times of year are more hectic and more prone to storms.  Why do so many people thrive on this chaos? You can appreciate people any period of the year.  Remind yourself how it feels to receive a letter, visit or phonecall out of the blue.  If you know emptiness or loneliness, then you view loved ones differently.  

Ask yourself what triggers a sense of trouble in the world. It tends to be counter-productive, human emotions.  The remedy for ignorance is insight.  Learning about the underlying nature of things and yourself is the key to disciplining the mind.  Every moment, you are becomng more discerning about your real needs, desires and illusions.

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Reader Comments (8)

Hi there Liara, I just wanted to say that I have enjoyed your posts. I don't always leave a comment, but I am still visiting. I do appreciate all the wonderful comments you have been leaving me, and I will try to do better at being a little more social.

I hope you have a happy and joyous holiday season.
December 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEric S.
Hi Liara,
Wonderful point -it's so easy to get caught up in everything - that we start to wait with expectation. When I am most at peace with myself is when I am not rushed, when I have no expectation of an outcome. And yet, that's usually not the case. I'm going to work on this, Liara, to really become lesss focused on awaiting might come - and instead just be in the moment.

Wishing you a wonderful and love-filled holiday season, Liara!
December 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLance
Eric S., while ascending a steep mountain path within the mind, somehow, human beings feel motivated to undertake an increaingly difficult climb. Life is this more exciting. The more we learn to observe ourselves, and better understand why we do things, the more likely we are to trigger our own self-realisations. Its all in the hope of positive change.
December 25, 2008 | Registered CommenterLiara Covert
Lance, I have friends who were stranded in airports due to Canadian winter storms that caused plane cancellations. They ended up taking trains and buses to their distant destinations. When the initial impatience wore off, they came to the realisation these alternate means of travel were preferable to the stress and hustle bustle of how they usually came home for the holidays. Regardless of your conditions, it is always possible to shift mindset to believe the universe is teaching us useful knowledge. It is up to each individual whether to adopt knowledge, create personal wisdom and choose to transform.
December 25, 2008 | Registered CommenterLiara Covert
Hi Liara. I was reading a passage in Eckhart's book yesterday that illustrates this very point. I've felt the difference when I experience something and expect a particular outcome. Expectations can be a burden. I've observed how good children are at this. They live for experience and that must be where they get their unlimited energy from.
December 25, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdavina
As I've grown older I've learned to recognize when I drift from the immediate moment. When I find myself going into the future of "what if's" or "waiting", which I rarely do anymore, I immediately bring myself back to this one single moment and let the rest go. It is very easeful and freeing to do this. I have learned that it means trusting in Life itself, that all things are perfect and there is indeed a force guiding me. I also believe that when we live in the moment we more easily align ourselves with the already perfect Universe. A bit like going with the current as opposed to swimming up stream. It's a great feeling to just let go and say, I've done all I can and now I let go and trust in the perfection....let go and BECOME the perfection that already exists.

Also....usually if we are "waiting" we are not fully living.
December 27, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRobin Easton
Davina, human beings get confused about goals because of being wrapped up on the concepts of "start" and "end" as well as a timeline that is supposed to guide them. All of this is an illusion of the mind. What if waiting is not part meant to be a human goal?

Buddhists say our goal is to save Humanity by expanding our thought processes, by learning to control our mind, and by not deliberately harming others. If you choose to believe you do not wait for anything, then you may choose to help others proactively and effectively. Eckhart Tolle expresses a parallel view. You resonate similar energy. Sometimes people feel torn about how to think. Listen to your core and discard the rest.
December 27, 2008 | Registered CommenterLiara Covert
Robin, you have evolved a great deal in your stages of awareness. You reveal personal insight into empty existence where you have reconnected with love and peace. This seems hard for many human beings to find. Your experience is inspiring. You recognize it helps to be able to attune to our inner selves, to replace conditioning with spiritual and other non-judgmental values. To evolve to understand impermanence of all composite things is to move beyond how people say you should live, to rediscover what it means to listen to yourself. As you trust and nurture faith, we grow with you. You are not alone.
December 27, 2008 | Registered CommenterLiara Covert

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